****RIDE WITH THE VIKING****
ITS A LIFESTYLE NOT A HOBBY!
RANDOM RANTS
Ok People....this following blog...or rant or whatever it turns out to be, really touches a nerve with me. Its about Pitbulls and Rotties and other dogs that people tend to mistreat and misuse. It really does piss me off...ALOT.
So I will start here:
I have owned dogs my whole life. Mostly pits and rotties. They are AMAZING dogs. They are loyal and incredibly smart and incredibly affectionate.( I have to share my bed AND my pillows with a 100+ pound Rottwieler and an ever growing Pitbull/bullmastif mix). Everytime I'm out with one of the dogs, it never fails....some fuckin' moron (usually some dickhead wannabe gangster , punk motherfucker) wants to try to compare himself to me by saying something completely fuckin' retarded like ...." Hey, homey..I gots me some too. I train me some PETbulls" For one thing, you incompetent fuckin' jackass... its PIT not PET. You are just as lame as the cockbreath that calls Rotties "ROCKwielers". If you can't even pronounce the name of the breed properly, chances are you are too fuckin' stupid to have one of these dogs. Lame fucks like this are a major reason that the all knowing, all seeing and always right...(I tried to type that with a shitload of sarcasm) try to pass breed specific laws. Like in Denver you are not allowed to own Pitbulls or any dog that has Pitbull " characteristics". Being a long time owner of pits, I will concede that they are extremely powerful animals and would be capable of hurting someone if not properly socialized. But thats not the dogs fault. That would lay right at the feet of the shitstain owner. You know the type. The fuckball wearing his hat all fuckin' sideways, thinkin' hes some kinda tough guy. I'd like to smash him right in the face with a big fuckin' hammer. This is the fuck who keeps the dog on a chain in some shithole garage only feeding him when he remembers too. The only reason this lame ass, cockstain piece of shit has the dog is to try to impress his equally lame ass loser friends. They tease the dog to try to make it aggressive thinking that automatically that makes it a guard dog. That way nobody will break in? And take what? Your dad's dildo collection? The chain digs into the dogs flesh causing him immeasurable pain and now thanks to the constant teasing the dog associates it with all people. The little guy is cold, hungry, neglected, abused, terrified, injured and in pain. So when he gets around people or gets loose of course he is gonna bite. The only thing he knows is abuse and anger. The dogs is a product of his "society". What the fuck did you expect? So when the newspaper gets ahold of the story it reads " Vicious Unprovoked Pitbull Attack" instead of what it should really read... " Worthless piece of shit mistreats his dog...lets all go stomp his ass". And because of all the past publicity about Pits, people go apeshit. Now while the worthless, sideways hat wearin' baggy pants, piece of human garbage owner gets a slap on the wrist the poor dog gets the honor of being euthenized and demonized. I am in favor of VERY harsh sentences for dickheads like this who cause the suffering of these animals, especially when it results in someone else getting hurt. Like paying for the hospitals bills if any, and expenses incurred in care of the dog, jail time...serious time, none of this 5 or 10 days bullshit. How about a year or more. I KNOW! Sentence these scumbags to 1 month locked in a room with me. I would start off by chaining the motherfucker up in a corner. I would bring my friends over to show off my prize and let them throw things at him and whomp him about the head and neck with a tire iron. But at least he would get to eat....whenever I shit in his bowl. I'd zap him in the sack with a stungun, drive screws behind his knee caps, shave his fingers down with a carrot peeler, shoot staples into his eyes, blow torch the back of his legs, drive pencils in his ears, clip his tongue with a pair of beat up metal shears then hang him upsidedown by his balls with a piece of barbed wire and pour concrete in his ass till the wire breaks. Is my point getting across?
And as for fuckheads who get off on fighting the dogs....I would do even worse! Trust me...Michael Vick and his cum gargling crew would think they ended up in some sort of psychotic, hellish Rob Zombie nightmare that never ends. If you think I am being a bit extreme take a look at some of the pictures here if you have the guts. I guarantee if you have any compassion what so ever you will be appalled at what people do to these fine animals. Click the Warning to view:
WARNING: IF YOU LOVE DOGS YOU ARE GONNA BE PISSED!
I have had Pits and Rotties and Bullmastiffs forever....look thru my albums, you will see the pics. My granddaughter eats with my Rottie, literally out of the same dish, and plays "kissyface" with my pitbull/bullmastiff. My pits of the past would play "dress up" with my girls and get their nails painted. We could turn them loose in the park and let them play with all the kids..NEVER worrying about them hurting anyone. It just twists my pickle when I hear uneducated, misinformed people make comments about these dogs. Like..."I would never have a Pitbull, they are dangerous". I can't even tell you how fuckin angry that makes me. Because it shows the widespread, media inspired panic and ignorance. Even where I live I am not supposed to have pitbulls or rotties. Its bullshit. I'm gonna end it here because I think I have made my point, even tho I feel I haven't said enough. So please folks....don't believe the hype. These dogs are not monsters or killing machines. They are companions. They have emotions. They feel. They are sad when you go. They are happy to see you when you get home. They just wanna play and be happy. Like you hear all the time...punish the deed, not the breed. Just beware of the assclown with the sideways hat and the dog. Remember...its not the dog thats the problem.
PEOPLE ARE JUST FUCKIN' STUPID
This one might take a while. Get a beer.
I have come to the conclusion, after many years of experience that there sure are alot and I mean ALOT of stupid motherfuckers floating around this planet. I don’t even know where to begin. I KNOW!...Lets start with..
WORK. We have all seen ’em. We have all had to deal with them. You gotta tell ’em the same shit everyday. Over and over. Same retarded questions everyday. And after you have explained it to this inbred, window lickin’, mouth breathin’ assmonkey time and time again, day after day, they still find a way to fuck it up! So you explain it AGAIN as you are fixing their handywork..again. You carefully explain what you are doing and why you are doing it. Speaking slowly and using really small and simple words so as not to confuse them even futher. "It’s really simple." you say. "If the number on the box matches the number on the shelf, take the stuff out of the box and put it on the shelf." So you try to control your rage as you look at them and see this look of complete and total....I dunno, whats the word I’m looking for??? Ummm...How about, glassy eyed retardation. They are completely fucking lost! You just wanna bang your head on the concrete. Or better yet, theirs! And just when you are about to lose control, grab them by the face and scream "Are you fucking retarded or what!?" they reply with a very well thought out "Oh...........ok." But you know.....you just know, that in 10 fuckin’ minutes this waste of skin is going to come up and ask you again.."where does this go?" So when in inevitable questions pops up again in a few minutes, you step back out of striking distance ( so you don’t lose your job) "Where does this go?" You reply...."I’m not sure. Why don’t you go ask him.", pointing to your buddy who now has this horrified look on hs face as the retard turns his direction and starts walking. You just smile and give him the finger and start laughing. OK, now your mind starts drifting as you go back to work... Who the fuck hired this dumbass? Why the fuck do they still have a job? Why THE FUCK are they making the same amount of money as me? Who dresses them in the morning? Are they really allowed to drive? WTF? Why do my balls itch? Wow shes got a nice ass, this song rocks!.....then outta nowhere, BANG, your own little dreamworld comes crashing down as you hear a voice behind you " He doesn’t know either." You close your eyes, hoping that its just a flashback or something. Slowly turn around and open your eyes. AWWWW FUCK. Its real.
The retard is standing there with that same stupid blank look. In the distance you see your buddy....giving you the finger. Yeah..go ahead, laugh motherfucker. I gotta deal with that shit everyday!
The self important cellphone fuck. Now I know you have dealt with this lowlife before. How can you not? In todays world where most douchebags have a bluetooth shoved up their ass or a cellphone plastered to their face. Fakeass, wannabe, self important, pencil dick annoying cockstains! Makes ya just wanna stomp a mudhole in ’em. Picture this....you are standing in line at a liquor store. Some asshole in front of you in a pair of Dockers and a faggy pullover is yammering on about some bullshit like everyone else in the place gives a fuck. Now this assclown makes his way to the counter and sets his bottled water down along with his equally gay 6 pack of Bud Light. As the clerk rings him up and gives him the total, this shitball lets out a big sigh and says to who ever is on the other end "Will you excuse me for just one second" , like the clerk is actually interferring! So now Mr. Bigshot is trying to hold the phone to his ear with his shoulder and dig his wallet out of his ass, all the while staring at the ceiling and oblivious to the fact that there are other people behind him, waiting....and waiting. So this assfuck finally gets his wallet out, looks around and flips his credit card at the clerk....ooohhhhh we are all just soooo impressed. Mr. Shitstain has a credit card. You’re my hero! NOT! So as the clerk looks apologeticly at the line behind the cellphone guy the dude has the balls to walk away from the counter and says " Hang on, I have a call on the other line" YOU GOTTA BE FUCKIN’ SHITTIN’ ME!!! I’m gonna kill him.
So I say fuck this....I walk up to the counter and push Mr. Bigshots stuff aside and tell the clerk "fuck him". The clerk replies "I’m so sorry sir, but I can’t ring him out until he signs the slip" Cool, alright....not the clerks fault, hes just doing his job. I can respect that. So I hollar at Mr. Bigshot..."Hey, assfuck! You wanna come finish this up or do I gotta smash you in the fuckin’ head and shove that phone up your ass?" I look at the clerk and smile. The clerk is stunned and shocked at first, but then tries not to laugh. Mr. Cockstain Bigshot is not amused. He looks over to the counter like he wants to cowboy up and brawl but I guess the site of a fully tattooed 6ft. 225 pound biker ready to punch his lights out changed his mind. Pussy. The dude behind me laughed so hard he blew a snot bubble. It took awhile but I finally got my goodies and got on down the road. Man, people are fucking stupid!........to be continued.
"FACTORY CUSTOM" MY FUCKIN' ASS!
OK folks, I been riding motorsickles for a long ass time. I’ve built and ridden Harley (Pan, Sportys and Evos), Triumph, Norton, Honda, Beemer and Yamaha. I am currently running the streets on a badass Roadstar that I have customized. Some shitstains say I’m not a "biker" because I ain’t riding Harley. I guess in the stereotypical imagination that might be true to some extent. But I did ride HD for the better part of 2 decades. So kiss my white ass! Lets talk about "bikers" for a moment. What is a "biker". I’ll tell ya what it ISN"T. It ISN"T the fuckhead that drops $35,000 on a "factory custom" and parks it in his fuckin’ driveway for his equally fucking retarded friends to come drool over! That ain’t nothin’ but driveway jewelry. If it comes from the factory...IT AINT CUSTOM, YOU STUPID FUCK! We are talking about the same overpaid, overstuffed suit who has watched one too many episodes of American Chopper or the equally gay Biker Build Off. Gimme a fuckin’ break.
Now every doctor or lawyer type thinks if he or she drops a shitload of cash on one of these trailer queen choppers or one of the many knock offs that are widely available, that all of a sudden they are a "biker". FUCK YOU! $35,000 and 30 miles don’t make you shit in my book. I got boots that got more miles on them than some of these faggots got on their bikes. You see ’em hanging out at the coffee shops, sippin’ on their fuckin’ $10 coffees braggin’ up a storm (thats my polite way of saying lying like a sack of shit to each other) about how hardcore they are. Again I say FUCK YOU! And if anyone of these shitstains calls me "bro" I’m gonna hammer him into the ground like a 2 penny nail! (You will read about my "bro" hang up in a later rant). Sound like I have a dislike for the new breed of Harley riders? You fuckin’ betcha I do! These assholes have driven the price of bikes and parts so high its insane. Been to a Harley shop lately? It’s all about selling accessories to the yuppie dirtbags and the wannabes. $500 leather jackets, $100 sunglasses and $30,000 bikes that you need to spend another $5k on to buy the shit that should have been on it to begin with. But these asswipes drop money like its a fuckin’ contest. And I guess to some of them it is! Hard working motherfuckers like me who rode HD thru the hard years can’t afford to buy ’em anymore because of the cappuccino crew. Now....old skool tramps that I know, thats a completely different animal. The "old" guys know the code. (again, I will go into that later). The clubbers know the code, the 1%ers know the code.....OK time to regress, I’m getting off subject.
What the fuck was I talking about before I drifted off into my rant.....oh yeah...bikers. Bikers will do things like ride a road for 300 miles just to see where it goes. Bikers will stop to help ya know matter what yer riding ( it goes back to the code). I guess the best way to sum it up is.....
.Its a way of life....If I have to explain it to ya...you won’t understand anyway.
I SHOULD BE PREZ. HERES WHY
I should be a friggin’ write in candidate for President. Hillary is an overly emotional trainwreck who is flying on the coat tail of her hubby’s term in office, and Obama is a lying sack of shit with no original ideas who might actually do more harm than good if he can get Congress to see things his way. So FUCK HIM!
As your President I would : Pull the troops out the middle east thus saving a SHITLOAD of cash that could be better applied elsewhere. Like using it to create jobs and stimulate the economy. Now that the troops have had experience I would place them at our borders and SEAL THIS FUCKING COUNTRY OFF! No more, we have enough fucking people without fuckers trying to sneak in, commit crimes and steal everything in site while they are ripping off the welfare system. You get caught coming across the border...BANG! Your ass is toast. You will be shot as an economic terrorist. And if the fucks in the oil rich middle east don’t wanna play ball when it comes time to buy oil....guess what, you get no food, no medical aid, no economic aid..nothing. Try growing your crops in the fucking sand! Starve for a while and see if ya wanna come down on that price a bit! And if other countries wanna try to give them the aid that we are denying, well then guess what...yer fucked too. What would happen to Japan, China and the like if the US was to completely stop buying their exports? We would buy American, we would regenerate the economy, we would be keeping American money in American hands. Japan would be way FOOKED if we stopped buying cars, TVs, motorcycles etc.....
Ya I know, sounds a bit extreme to some and don’t gimme your bleeding heart bullshit that if we don’t help people in other countries that cockstains like Osama will terrorize them and use them and kill them blah, blah, blah. I give a fuck. Ask the homeless vet that needs help if he gives a fuck, ask the single parents who cant feed their kids if they give a fuck, ask the poor kids who cant get school supplies if they give a fuck. The list could go on forever. What do we need that we can’t do for ourselves? Think of the jobs created if we started switching over to biofuels little by little. We are paying farmers NOT to farm! WTF? Let them farm and keep our grains and whatnot to ourselves instead of feeding the world and make the fucking fuel already!
Legalize pot. Fucking A. Grow it, sell it, tax it. Just like cigarettes.
Healthcare. With all the money that we could save doing the above mentioned things plus some other shit I have yet to discuss we could have national healthcare. And GOOD healthcare at that! Pay the doctors and their staff well, maybe provide housing as part of their pay. BUT them docs start messing around and treating folks bad, your ass is unemployed. They would treat people better if they knew they could lose their cash AND their house!
Taxes. The government needs tax money to operate, thats a given. I say EVERYONE pays a flat tax percent. Like 20% for example. Everyone from your minimum wage assbuster to your overpaid pro athlete. No tax breaks or credits. You want child care credit....fuck you. If yer gonna have kids you better be able to afford them your damn self.
Crime. You fuck up, you pay for it. You kill someone-you die. Hypocritical you say. Ask the victims family what they think. Would you rather spend the 40K a year to house this prick for the next 50 years or spend the $1.25 for a bullet and use the TWO MILLION dollars you saved to do something constructive with. Like say.....making sure the poorer kids have a good Christmas too. See what I’m saying here people. Its time to really take a retrospective look at ourselves and say "What the Fuck?"
"BRO"?
Bro? I aint your fuckin’ Bro!
Call me old skool, call me old. I don't give a rats fat ass. If I have one more douchebag call me "bro", I'm gonna stomp his guts out. Seems most people forgot...or never knew, what a "bro" really is. Just because you gave me a soda at work don't make you my "bro", you assclown! Far from it. And if I don't even know you at all, don't even try that "bro" shit with me. It ain't gonna fly for half a second! BRO is something you earn. It aint something you get overnight. Herpes you get overnight. So many people use it so often that its obvious they don't have a clue.
Listen up.
A bro is someone you would trust your life with.
A bro is someone you could leave alone with your wife and know that nothing stupid is gonna happen.
A bro will protect you (as you would him) when the shit hits the fan.
A bro will jump into the middle of a bar fight with you.
A bro will go without to make sure you don't. Get it?!
So when some jerkoff saunters on up to me and says "Nice bike, bro", I can feel my teeth clench and I get that tingle in my neck....you know the one. The one you get right before you unleash on someone. Its not just a pet peave with me, its a major psychotic rage. When some monkeyfuck starts calling me "bro" it usually means Bend Right Over because they usually want something. They just don't get it. So If I haven't seen you ride next to me, if I haven't seen you sit next to me in jail, if you haven't taken on an entire bar with me, if I have never given you the shirt off my back....I ain't your fuckin' bro!
THE "CODE"
THE BIKER CODE
A few of you have asked, after reading my last little rant, about "The Code". What is it? What does it mean? The code is a set of guidelines that us old schoolers abide by. It is our job to teach the "new guys" and the youngsters in the bike world. I have always said that if the whole world were to operate by the code.....blah blah blah
THE CODE
First off...Be a man. If you say you are gonna do something then fuckin’ do it! If you have obligations you fullfill them. Be a man of your word. If you are full of shit the you aint worth a shit.
Do no harm to women, children or animals. Only a fuckin’ punk does that, not a man. I rank that type of scumbag right up there with a bike thief. If you are caught you will be shown NO FUCKIN’ MERCY! Count on that.
Help those in need when you can. Show kindness to those around you and it WILL be returned. If a fellow rider is stranded on the side of the road, no matter what he or she is riding, fucking stop and do what you can! Even if its just to lend some moral support. Don’t just go by and pretend you don’t see them. Remember...karma can be a real motherfucker!
Don't backstab or shit talk. How do you expect to earn respect when everyone thinks you are a babbling sack of shit.
Show respect to EVERYONE. Right off the bat you show respect to who ever you are around until they have done something to lose that respect. Once they lose the respect you just don't deal with them anymore. Remember..no shit talking. If the dude is a punk then say he is a punk and let it go.Its not about WHAT you ride, its THAT you ride. And I do mean ride. I’m not talking about them yuppie wannabes that think they are "one of us" because the spent huge cash on bike only to let it sit in the driveway. RIDE MOTHERFUCKER, RIDE!
Live everyday like its your last, because it could be. All it takes is some dumbass teenage bimbo on her cellphone or some blind old fuck to run a light or turn across traffic in front of you and you are roadkill.Pretty simple shit, ain’t it. Now get off your ass and get in the wind dammit
WHAT A FUCKIN’ TOOL!
So this assclown writes me an email about how I am trying to fool people into thinking I ride a Harley because I have apehangers on my bike and apehangers are for HD. What a fuckin’ dumbass. He supplies a pic of his "totally custom hog" which was nothing more than an 883 Sportster with little girlie mini apes. Bone stock, except for his pathetic little 10 inch "apes". So instead of writing him back and take the chance that he would try to turn me in for harassment or some shit I figured I would rip him a new asshole here and send him the link.
OK you assfuck, lets pick apart your retarded email and show everyone what a fuckin’ tool you really are.
The email came addressed from "Mad Dog". Ooooohhh, scary. Mad Dog? On a Sporty? More like "piddle puppy". You and your bad ass "totally custom hog" make me laugh. 883, huh? Wow, I would be impressed except for the fact that I’m pushing that out of each cylinder (cylinder = those are the tall finned things that the piston slides up and down in, kinda like your ass at a gay frat party). And as far as your "apes", my cock is bigger than that when I get out of an ice cold river (didn’t mean to get ya all hot and bothered there, "Piddle Puppy"). "Totally Custom" my balls! You are such a pathetic little boy (or is it boi?). You are just another loser who thinks you can buy a "custom". Custom means one of a kind. Tailored for you, by you! Not a bone stock bike with a handlebar swap, fuckhead. Your lameass little bike just screams "Village People". Assclown! But enough about your little HD "Skirtster", lets talk about you, ya piece of shit. What the fuck do you care what I ride. Does that fact that I ride 10’s of thousands of miles a year on a bigger, better bike make you feel like a little schoolgirl? What do you know about real riding anyway? Jerk off. I’m not trying to "fool" anyone because I flat don’t give a shit what people think, especially a goofy little puppy like yourself. Yes I ride a Yamaha. A 102 cubic inch (that’s 1700 cc, but I am sure such an expert on bikes knew that right off), fire breathing, mile pounding (does the word "pounding" remind you of your ass?) Yamaha. Complete with 16 inch 1.25 dia. apes and more truly custom built (by me) parts that you have seen in your self absorbed, plastic, phony, fake little existence. If you are worried that people will confuse me with a "real" biker like you, I’m sorry. No I’m not. NO WAY would anybody confuse me with a pathetic, goofy, wanna-be, little bitch like you. You are just feeling dejected because I am better than you. Better at riding, better at building bikes, better at everything…except sucking cock, I bet you are a real pro at that! You also made mention that you have seen me "riding around town" like I’m "king shit". Well listen up little man, next time you see me, feel free to cowboy up and flag me down. I am more than willing to discuss this with you in person. Just make sure you up your insurance first, you will need it, cockbreath.
ASSHOLE COPS
Usually I try to just ignore cops hoping that they in turn will leave me the fuck alone. For the most part I have no problems and no beefs with cops…anymore. BUT there is this pair of asshole Larimer County deputies that patrol the south end of Ft. Collins at about 2a.m. right as I am leaving for work on my scoot. These guys or maybe its just one of them, is a complete cockmunch. They fuckin’ see me everyday. They know I’m not leaving a bar or some kinda silly shit. They see me stop in the 7-11 and get a drink…everyday. EVERY-FUCKING-DAY. So why do they insist on fucking with me? Because I am on a bike, that’s why. FUCK YOU! This morning I am on my way to work. I stop at the sign at the end of the street to let the oncoming car go. Guess who? Go on, guess. I’ll give ya a hint, sounds like…asshole cop. He cruises by me and snaps his head over at me like I fuckin'’ scared him or something. Asshole. So this fuck pulls over to the side of the road and I think "Great, this prick is gonna fuck with me and make me late for work." Asshole. So I reach to my jacket pocket to make sure I have my wallet containing my license and insurance. Yup Yup, got it. Go ahead fucker, pull me over. I’m barely awake and not in the mood for your shit. So as I just start out into the street this fuckin, prick flips a U-turn and is now facing me in the oncoming lane. Asshole. "Cool" I say to myself, "Maybe this dick has something better to do than fuck with me tonight." No such luck. As I pass by this sorry sack of shit he flips on his spotlight and blasts me in the face with it, effectively killing my night vision, on a motorcycle at 1:30 in the fuckin’ morning. Asshole. I try not to look directly into the light as I go by and glare at him for being the cocksucker that he is. I make sure not to get on those straight pipes too hard and keep my speed in check so that he has no legal "probable cause" to pull me over. Like that ever fuckin’ mattered anyway. Asshole. So now this assfuck flips back around and falls in right behind me. And I do mean RIGHT THE FUCK BEHIND ME! If he got any closer he would have to buy me dinner. Faggot. So now not only is he being a fucking asshole but he is breaking the law. He is tailgating me so close that it could easily be construed as careless maybe even reckless driving. This assfuck is really pissing me off. Asshole. So I tap my brakes a few times to let this fucker know that I am going to slow down and to back the fuck up off me. I click on my signal and slow down to turn into 7-11 for my daily pitstop. This fuckin’ jerkoff damn near hits me as we enter the lot. Asshole. As I turn in front of the building guess who is at the other end of the lot with just his running light on? Go on, guess. Yup the other boy in blue. As I pull into a spot right in front of the doors I thought for sure that the tool driving the cop car was gonna clip me. So now I kill the motor and get my ass inside where I know and I know he knows, ya know, that there is video surveillance. That should keep his fuckin’ ass in check. Now this shitstain circles the lot and parks out by the pumps and kills his lights and just sits there watching me. Asshole. So I saunter thru the store and grab my energy drinks and this assclown is still sitting there just watching. So I make deliberate motions letting him now that I am talking about him and pointing at him. I buy my stuff and ask the clerk for a pen and paper. Time for a little game. I walk over to the glass door and hold the paper up to it, look right at the cop and jot a quick note and hand it to the clerk, hoping the cop would think I was documenting something about him. As soon as I flipped the paper to the clerk the cop kicked his lights on and hauled ass out of the lot like he got this sudden emergency call or some shit. I know god damn good and well he didn’t because the other cop was still just sitting in the corner of the lot, jerking off or eating a donut or something. The clerk read the note and busted up laughing. He reads the note out loud to the other clerk on duty " That cop is a complete asshole." He then proceeds to tell me about how this same assfuck is in the lot harassing people all the time and gets all pissed off when they make him pay for his coffee. So this afternoon when I got home I called the fuckers watch commander and dropped the hammer on him. Asshole. Maybe I should have just let it be, maybe not. I’m not doing anything wrong. I’m just going to work so FUCK YOU! You had best get over yourself and double quick. Asshole. Go make yourself useful somewhere. That’s what you are getting paid to do. With my tax dollars I might add. You aren’t getting paid to be a total fuckin’ asshole so knock it the fuck off. Whats the matter? Daddy fuck you in the ass one too many times and now you got an attitude? Your mom used to gangbang bikers by the dozen so now you gotta fuck with me? Or are you pissed than I am everything you don’t have the guts to be? Whatever your fuckin’ trip is you had best step off my dick, motherfucker. Wonder how much money I could make suing the county for harassment? Asshole.
Ok People....this following blog...or rant or whatever it turns out to be, really touches a nerve with me. Its about Pitbulls and Rotties and other dogs that people tend to mistreat and misuse. It really does piss me off...ALOT.
So I will start here:
I have owned dogs my whole life. Mostly pits and rotties. They are AMAZING dogs. They are loyal and incredibly smart and incredibly affectionate.( I have to share my bed AND my pillows with a 100+ pound Rottwieler and an ever growing Pitbull/bullmastif mix). Everytime I'm out with one of the dogs, it never fails....some fuckin' moron (usually some dickhead wannabe gangster , punk motherfucker) wants to try to compare himself to me by saying something completely fuckin' retarded like ...." Hey, homey..I gots me some too. I train me some PETbulls" For one thing, you incompetent fuckin' jackass... its PIT not PET. You are just as lame as the cockbreath that calls Rotties "ROCKwielers". If you can't even pronounce the name of the breed properly, chances are you are too fuckin' stupid to have one of these dogs. Lame fucks like this are a major reason that the all knowing, all seeing and always right...(I tried to type that with a shitload of sarcasm) try to pass breed specific laws. Like in Denver you are not allowed to own Pitbulls or any dog that has Pitbull " characteristics". Being a long time owner of pits, I will concede that they are extremely powerful animals and would be capable of hurting someone if not properly socialized. But thats not the dogs fault. That would lay right at the feet of the shitstain owner. You know the type. The fuckball wearing his hat all fuckin' sideways, thinkin' hes some kinda tough guy. I'd like to smash him right in the face with a big fuckin' hammer. This is the fuck who keeps the dog on a chain in some shithole garage only feeding him when he remembers too. The only reason this lame ass, cockstain piece of shit has the dog is to try to impress his equally lame ass loser friends. They tease the dog to try to make it aggressive thinking that automatically that makes it a guard dog. That way nobody will break in? And take what? Your dad's dildo collection? The chain digs into the dogs flesh causing him immeasurable pain and now thanks to the constant teasing the dog associates it with all people. The little guy is cold, hungry, neglected, abused, terrified, injured and in pain. So when he gets around people or gets loose of course he is gonna bite. The only thing he knows is abuse and anger. The dogs is a product of his "society". What the fuck did you expect? So when the newspaper gets ahold of the story it reads " Vicious Unprovoked Pitbull Attack" instead of what it should really read... " Worthless piece of shit mistreats his dog...lets all go stomp his ass". And because of all the past publicity about Pits, people go apeshit. Now while the worthless, sideways hat wearin' baggy pants, piece of human garbage owner gets a slap on the wrist the poor dog gets the honor of being euthenized and demonized. I am in favor of VERY harsh sentences for dickheads like this who cause the suffering of these animals, especially when it results in someone else getting hurt. Like paying for the hospitals bills if any, and expenses incurred in care of the dog, jail time...serious time, none of this 5 or 10 days bullshit. How about a year or more. I KNOW! Sentence these scumbags to 1 month locked in a room with me. I would start off by chaining the motherfucker up in a corner. I would bring my friends over to show off my prize and let them throw things at him and whomp him about the head and neck with a tire iron. But at least he would get to eat....whenever I shit in his bowl. I'd zap him in the sack with a stungun, drive screws behind his knee caps, shave his fingers down with a carrot peeler, shoot staples into his eyes, blow torch the back of his legs, drive pencils in his ears, clip his tongue with a pair of beat up metal shears then hang him upsidedown by his balls with a piece of barbed wire and pour concrete in his ass till the wire breaks. Is my point getting across?
And as for fuckheads who get off on fighting the dogs....I would do even worse! Trust me...Michael Vick and his cum gargling crew would think they ended up in some sort of psychotic, hellish Rob Zombie nightmare that never ends. If you think I am being a bit extreme take a look at some of the pictures here if you have the guts. I guarantee if you have any compassion what so ever you will be appalled at what people do to these fine animals. Click the Warning to view:
WARNING: IF YOU LOVE DOGS YOU ARE GONNA BE PISSED!
I have had Pits and Rotties and Bullmastiffs forever....look thru my albums, you will see the pics. My granddaughter eats with my Rottie, literally out of the same dish, and plays "kissyface" with my pitbull/bullmastiff. My pits of the past would play "dress up" with my girls and get their nails painted. We could turn them loose in the park and let them play with all the kids..NEVER worrying about them hurting anyone. It just twists my pickle when I hear uneducated, misinformed people make comments about these dogs. Like..."I would never have a Pitbull, they are dangerous". I can't even tell you how fuckin angry that makes me. Because it shows the widespread, media inspired panic and ignorance. Even where I live I am not supposed to have pitbulls or rotties. Its bullshit. I'm gonna end it here because I think I have made my point, even tho I feel I haven't said enough. So please folks....don't believe the hype. These dogs are not monsters or killing machines. They are companions. They have emotions. They feel. They are sad when you go. They are happy to see you when you get home. They just wanna play and be happy. Like you hear all the time...punish the deed, not the breed. Just beware of the assclown with the sideways hat and the dog. Remember...its not the dog thats the problem.
PEOPLE ARE JUST FUCKIN' STUPID
This one might take a while. Get a beer.
I have come to the conclusion, after many years of experience that there sure are alot and I mean ALOT of stupid motherfuckers floating around this planet. I don’t even know where to begin. I KNOW!...Lets start with..
WORK. We have all seen ’em. We have all had to deal with them. You gotta tell ’em the same shit everyday. Over and over. Same retarded questions everyday. And after you have explained it to this inbred, window lickin’, mouth breathin’ assmonkey time and time again, day after day, they still find a way to fuck it up! So you explain it AGAIN as you are fixing their handywork..again. You carefully explain what you are doing and why you are doing it. Speaking slowly and using really small and simple words so as not to confuse them even futher. "It’s really simple." you say. "If the number on the box matches the number on the shelf, take the stuff out of the box and put it on the shelf." So you try to control your rage as you look at them and see this look of complete and total....I dunno, whats the word I’m looking for??? Ummm...How about, glassy eyed retardation. They are completely fucking lost! You just wanna bang your head on the concrete. Or better yet, theirs! And just when you are about to lose control, grab them by the face and scream "Are you fucking retarded or what!?" they reply with a very well thought out "Oh...........ok." But you know.....you just know, that in 10 fuckin’ minutes this waste of skin is going to come up and ask you again.."where does this go?" So when in inevitable questions pops up again in a few minutes, you step back out of striking distance ( so you don’t lose your job) "Where does this go?" You reply...."I’m not sure. Why don’t you go ask him.", pointing to your buddy who now has this horrified look on hs face as the retard turns his direction and starts walking. You just smile and give him the finger and start laughing. OK, now your mind starts drifting as you go back to work... Who the fuck hired this dumbass? Why the fuck do they still have a job? Why THE FUCK are they making the same amount of money as me? Who dresses them in the morning? Are they really allowed to drive? WTF? Why do my balls itch? Wow shes got a nice ass, this song rocks!.....then outta nowhere, BANG, your own little dreamworld comes crashing down as you hear a voice behind you " He doesn’t know either." You close your eyes, hoping that its just a flashback or something. Slowly turn around and open your eyes. AWWWW FUCK. Its real. The retard is standing there with that same stupid blank look. In the distance you see your buddy....giving you the finger. Yeah..go ahead, laugh motherfucker. I gotta deal with that shit everyday!
The self important cellphone fuck. Now I know you have dealt with this lowlife before. How can you not? In todays world where most douchebags have a bluetooth shoved up their ass or a cellphone plastered to their face. Fakeass, wannabe, self important, pencil dick annoying cockstains! Makes ya just wanna stomp a mudhole in ’em. Picture this....you are standing in line at a liquor store. Some asshole in front of you in a pair of Dockers and a faggy pullover is yammering on about some bullshit like everyone else in the place gives a fuck. Now this assclown makes his way to the counter and sets his bottled water down along with his equally gay 6 pack of Bud Light. As the clerk rings him up and gives him the total, this shitball lets out a big sigh and says to who ever is on the other end "Will you excuse me for just one second" , like the clerk is actually interferring! So now Mr. Bigshot is trying to hold the phone to his ear with his shoulder and dig his wallet out of his ass, all the while staring at the ceiling and oblivious to the fact that there are other people behind him, waiting....and waiting. So this assfuck finally gets his wallet out, looks around and flips his credit card at the clerk....ooohhhhh we are all just soooo impressed. Mr. Shitstain has a credit card. You’re my hero! NOT! So as the clerk looks apologeticly at the line behind the cellphone guy the dude has the balls to walk away from the counter and says " Hang on, I have a call on the other line" YOU GOTTA BE FUCKIN’ SHITTIN’ ME!!! I’m gonna kill him. So I say fuck this....I walk up to the counter and push Mr. Bigshots stuff aside and tell the clerk "fuck him". The clerk replies "I’m so sorry sir, but I can’t ring him out until he signs the slip" Cool, alright....not the clerks fault, hes just doing his job. I can respect that. So I hollar at Mr. Bigshot..."Hey, assfuck! You wanna come finish this up or do I gotta smash you in the fuckin’ head and shove that phone up your ass?" I look at the clerk and smile. The clerk is stunned and shocked at first, but then tries not to laugh. Mr. Cockstain Bigshot is not amused. He looks over to the counter like he wants to cowboy up and brawl but I guess the site of a fully tattooed 6ft. 225 pound biker ready to punch his lights out changed his mind. Pussy. The dude behind me laughed so hard he blew a snot bubble. It took awhile but I finally got my goodies and got on down the road. Man, people are fucking stupid!........to be continued.
"FACTORY CUSTOM" MY FUCKIN' ASS!
OK folks, I been riding motorsickles for a long ass time. I’ve built and ridden Harley (Pan, Sportys and Evos), Triumph, Norton, Honda, Beemer and Yamaha. I am currently running the streets on a badass Roadstar that I have customized. Some shitstains say I’m not a "biker" because I ain’t riding Harley. I guess in the stereotypical imagination that might be true to some extent. But I did ride HD for the better part of 2 decades. So kiss my white ass! Lets talk about "bikers" for a moment. What is a "biker". I’ll tell ya what it ISN"T. It ISN"T the fuckhead that drops $35,000 on a "factory custom" and parks it in his fuckin’ driveway for his equally fucking retarded friends to come drool over! That ain’t nothin’ but driveway jewelry. If it comes from the factory...IT AINT CUSTOM, YOU STUPID FUCK! We are talking about the same overpaid, overstuffed suit who has watched one too many episodes of American Chopper or the equally gay Biker Build Off. Gimme a fuckin’ break. Now every doctor or lawyer type thinks if he or she drops a shitload of cash on one of these trailer queen choppers or one of the many knock offs that are widely available, that all of a sudden they are a "biker". FUCK YOU! $35,000 and 30 miles don’t make you shit in my book. I got boots that got more miles on them than some of these faggots got on their bikes. You see ’em hanging out at the coffee shops, sippin’ on their fuckin’ $10 coffees braggin’ up a storm (thats my polite way of saying lying like a sack of shit to each other) about how hardcore they are. Again I say FUCK YOU! And if anyone of these shitstains calls me "bro" I’m gonna hammer him into the ground like a 2 penny nail! (You will read about my "bro" hang up in a later rant). Sound like I have a dislike for the new breed of Harley riders? You fuckin’ betcha I do! These assholes have driven the price of bikes and parts so high its insane. Been to a Harley shop lately? It’s all about selling accessories to the yuppie dirtbags and the wannabes. $500 leather jackets, $100 sunglasses and $30,000 bikes that you need to spend another $5k on to buy the shit that should have been on it to begin with. But these asswipes drop money like its a fuckin’ contest. And I guess to some of them it is! Hard working motherfuckers like me who rode HD thru the hard years can’t afford to buy ’em anymore because of the cappuccino crew. Now....old skool tramps that I know, thats a completely different animal. The "old" guys know the code. (again, I will go into that later). The clubbers know the code, the 1%ers know the code.....OK time to regress, I’m getting off subject.
What the fuck was I talking about before I drifted off into my rant.....oh yeah...bikers. Bikers will do things like ride a road for 300 miles just to see where it goes. Bikers will stop to help ya know matter what yer riding ( it goes back to the code). I guess the best way to sum it up is.....
.Its a way of life....If I have to explain it to ya...you won’t understand anyway.
I SHOULD BE PREZ. HERES WHY
I should be a friggin’ write in candidate for President. Hillary is an overly emotional trainwreck who is flying on the coat tail of her hubby’s term in office, and Obama is a lying sack of shit with no original ideas who might actually do more harm than good if he can get Congress to see things his way. So FUCK HIM!
As your President I would : Pull the troops out the middle east thus saving a SHITLOAD of cash that could be better applied elsewhere. Like using it to create jobs and stimulate the economy. Now that the troops have had experience I would place them at our borders and SEAL THIS FUCKING COUNTRY OFF! No more, we have enough fucking people without fuckers trying to sneak in, commit crimes and steal everything in site while they are ripping off the welfare system. You get caught coming across the border...BANG! Your ass is toast. You will be shot as an economic terrorist. And if the fucks in the oil rich middle east don’t wanna play ball when it comes time to buy oil....guess what, you get no food, no medical aid, no economic aid..nothing. Try growing your crops in the fucking sand! Starve for a while and see if ya wanna come down on that price a bit! And if other countries wanna try to give them the aid that we are denying, well then guess what...yer fucked too. What would happen to Japan, China and the like if the US was to completely stop buying their exports? We would buy American, we would regenerate the economy, we would be keeping American money in American hands. Japan would be way FOOKED if we stopped buying cars, TVs, motorcycles etc.....
Ya I know, sounds a bit extreme to some and don’t gimme your bleeding heart bullshit that if we don’t help people in other countries that cockstains like Osama will terrorize them and use them and kill them blah, blah, blah. I give a fuck. Ask the homeless vet that needs help if he gives a fuck, ask the single parents who cant feed their kids if they give a fuck, ask the poor kids who cant get school supplies if they give a fuck. The list could go on forever. What do we need that we can’t do for ourselves? Think of the jobs created if we started switching over to biofuels little by little. We are paying farmers NOT to farm! WTF? Let them farm and keep our grains and whatnot to ourselves instead of feeding the world and make the fucking fuel already!
Legalize pot. Fucking A. Grow it, sell it, tax it. Just like cigarettes.
Healthcare. With all the money that we could save doing the above mentioned things plus some other shit I have yet to discuss we could have national healthcare. And GOOD healthcare at that! Pay the doctors and their staff well, maybe provide housing as part of their pay. BUT them docs start messing around and treating folks bad, your ass is unemployed. They would treat people better if they knew they could lose their cash AND their house!
Taxes. The government needs tax money to operate, thats a given. I say EVERYONE pays a flat tax percent. Like 20% for example. Everyone from your minimum wage assbuster to your overpaid pro athlete. No tax breaks or credits. You want child care credit....fuck you. If yer gonna have kids you better be able to afford them your damn self.
Crime. You fuck up, you pay for it. You kill someone-you die. Hypocritical you say. Ask the victims family what they think. Would you rather spend the 40K a year to house this prick for the next 50 years or spend the $1.25 for a bullet and use the TWO MILLION dollars you saved to do something constructive with. Like say.....making sure the poorer kids have a good Christmas too. See what I’m saying here people. Its time to really take a retrospective look at ourselves and say "What the Fuck?"
"BRO"?
Bro? I aint your fuckin’ Bro!
Call me old skool, call me old. I don't give a rats fat ass. If I have one more douchebag call me "bro", I'm gonna stomp his guts out. Seems most people forgot...or never knew, what a "bro" really is. Just because you gave me a soda at work don't make you my "bro", you assclown! Far from it. And if I don't even know you at all, don't even try that "bro" shit with me. It ain't gonna fly for half a second! BRO is something you earn. It aint something you get overnight. Herpes you get overnight. So many people use it so often that its obvious they don't have a clue.
Listen up.
A bro is someone you would trust your life with.
A bro is someone you could leave alone with your wife and know that nothing stupid is gonna happen.
A bro will protect you (as you would him) when the shit hits the fan.
A bro will jump into the middle of a bar fight with you.
A bro will go without to make sure you don't. Get it?!
So when some jerkoff saunters on up to me and says "Nice bike, bro", I can feel my teeth clench and I get that tingle in my neck....you know the one. The one you get right before you unleash on someone. Its not just a pet peave with me, its a major psychotic rage. When some monkeyfuck starts calling me "bro" it usually means Bend Right Over because they usually want something. They just don't get it. So If I haven't seen you ride next to me, if I haven't seen you sit next to me in jail, if you haven't taken on an entire bar with me, if I have never given you the shirt off my back....I ain't your fuckin' bro!
THE "CODE"
THE BIKER CODE
A few of you have asked, after reading my last little rant, about "The Code". What is it? What does it mean? The code is a set of guidelines that us old schoolers abide by. It is our job to teach the "new guys" and the youngsters in the bike world. I have always said that if the whole world were to operate by the code.....blah blah blah
THE CODE
First off...Be a man. If you say you are gonna do something then fuckin’ do it! If you have obligations you fullfill them. Be a man of your word. If you are full of shit the you aint worth a shit.
Do no harm to women, children or animals. Only a fuckin’ punk does that, not a man. I rank that type of scumbag right up there with a bike thief. If you are caught you will be shown NO FUCKIN’ MERCY! Count on that.
Help those in need when you can. Show kindness to those around you and it WILL be returned. If a fellow rider is stranded on the side of the road, no matter what he or she is riding, fucking stop and do what you can! Even if its just to lend some moral support. Don’t just go by and pretend you don’t see them. Remember...karma can be a real motherfucker!
Don't backstab or shit talk. How do you expect to earn respect when everyone thinks you are a babbling sack of shit.
Show respect to EVERYONE. Right off the bat you show respect to who ever you are around until they have done something to lose that respect. Once they lose the respect you just don't deal with them anymore. Remember..no shit talking. If the dude is a punk then say he is a punk and let it go.Its not about WHAT you ride, its THAT you ride. And I do mean ride. I’m not talking about them yuppie wannabes that think they are "one of us" because the spent huge cash on bike only to let it sit in the driveway. RIDE MOTHERFUCKER, RIDE!
Live everyday like its your last, because it could be. All it takes is some dumbass teenage bimbo on her cellphone or some blind old fuck to run a light or turn across traffic in front of you and you are roadkill.Pretty simple shit, ain’t it. Now get off your ass and get in the wind dammit
WHAT A FUCKIN’ TOOL!
So this assclown writes me an email about how I am trying to fool people into thinking I ride a Harley because I have apehangers on my bike and apehangers are for HD. What a fuckin’ dumbass. He supplies a pic of his "totally custom hog" which was nothing more than an 883 Sportster with little girlie mini apes. Bone stock, except for his pathetic little 10 inch "apes". So instead of writing him back and take the chance that he would try to turn me in for harassment or some shit I figured I would rip him a new asshole here and send him the link.
OK you assfuck, lets pick apart your retarded email and show everyone what a fuckin’ tool you really are.
The email came addressed from "Mad Dog". Ooooohhh, scary. Mad Dog? On a Sporty? More like "piddle puppy". You and your bad ass "totally custom hog" make me laugh. 883, huh? Wow, I would be impressed except for the fact that I’m pushing that out of each cylinder (cylinder = those are the tall finned things that the piston slides up and down in, kinda like your ass at a gay frat party). And as far as your "apes", my cock is bigger than that when I get out of an ice cold river (didn’t mean to get ya all hot and bothered there, "Piddle Puppy"). "Totally Custom" my balls! You are such a pathetic little boy (or is it boi?). You are just another loser who thinks you can buy a "custom". Custom means one of a kind. Tailored for you, by you! Not a bone stock bike with a handlebar swap, fuckhead. Your lameass little bike just screams "Village People". Assclown! But enough about your little HD "Skirtster", lets talk about you, ya piece of shit. What the fuck do you care what I ride. Does that fact that I ride 10’s of thousands of miles a year on a bigger, better bike make you feel like a little schoolgirl? What do you know about real riding anyway? Jerk off. I’m not trying to "fool" anyone because I flat don’t give a shit what people think, especially a goofy little puppy like yourself. Yes I ride a Yamaha. A 102 cubic inch (that’s 1700 cc, but I am sure such an expert on bikes knew that right off), fire breathing, mile pounding (does the word "pounding" remind you of your ass?) Yamaha. Complete with 16 inch 1.25 dia. apes and more truly custom built (by me) parts that you have seen in your self absorbed, plastic, phony, fake little existence. If you are worried that people will confuse me with a "real" biker like you, I’m sorry. No I’m not. NO WAY would anybody confuse me with a pathetic, goofy, wanna-be, little bitch like you. You are just feeling dejected because I am better than you. Better at riding, better at building bikes, better at everything…except sucking cock, I bet you are a real pro at that! You also made mention that you have seen me "riding around town" like I’m "king shit". Well listen up little man, next time you see me, feel free to cowboy up and flag me down. I am more than willing to discuss this with you in person. Just make sure you up your insurance first, you will need it, cockbreath.
ASSHOLE COPS
Usually I try to just ignore cops hoping that they in turn will leave me the fuck alone. For the most part I have no problems and no beefs with cops…anymore. BUT there is this pair of asshole Larimer County deputies that patrol the south end of Ft. Collins at about 2a.m. right as I am leaving for work on my scoot. These guys or maybe its just one of them, is a complete cockmunch. They fuckin’ see me everyday. They know I’m not leaving a bar or some kinda silly shit. They see me stop in the 7-11 and get a drink…everyday. EVERY-FUCKING-DAY. So why do they insist on fucking with me? Because I am on a bike, that’s why. FUCK YOU! This morning I am on my way to work. I stop at the sign at the end of the street to let the oncoming car go. Guess who? Go on, guess. I’ll give ya a hint, sounds like…asshole cop. He cruises by me and snaps his head over at me like I fuckin'’ scared him or something. Asshole. So this fuck pulls over to the side of the road and I think "Great, this prick is gonna fuck with me and make me late for work." Asshole. So I reach to my jacket pocket to make sure I have my wallet containing my license and insurance. Yup Yup, got it. Go ahead fucker, pull me over. I’m barely awake and not in the mood for your shit. So as I just start out into the street this fuckin, prick flips a U-turn and is now facing me in the oncoming lane. Asshole. "Cool" I say to myself, "Maybe this dick has something better to do than fuck with me tonight." No such luck. As I pass by this sorry sack of shit he flips on his spotlight and blasts me in the face with it, effectively killing my night vision, on a motorcycle at 1:30 in the fuckin’ morning. Asshole. I try not to look directly into the light as I go by and glare at him for being the cocksucker that he is. I make sure not to get on those straight pipes too hard and keep my speed in check so that he has no legal "probable cause" to pull me over. Like that ever fuckin’ mattered anyway. Asshole. So now this assfuck flips back around and falls in right behind me. And I do mean RIGHT THE FUCK BEHIND ME! If he got any closer he would have to buy me dinner. Faggot. So now not only is he being a fucking asshole but he is breaking the law. He is tailgating me so close that it could easily be construed as careless maybe even reckless driving. This assfuck is really pissing me off. Asshole. So I tap my brakes a few times to let this fucker know that I am going to slow down and to back the fuck up off me. I click on my signal and slow down to turn into 7-11 for my daily pitstop. This fuckin’ jerkoff damn near hits me as we enter the lot. Asshole. As I turn in front of the building guess who is at the other end of the lot with just his running light on? Go on, guess. Yup the other boy in blue. As I pull into a spot right in front of the doors I thought for sure that the tool driving the cop car was gonna clip me. So now I kill the motor and get my ass inside where I know and I know he knows, ya know, that there is video surveillance. That should keep his fuckin’ ass in check. Now this shitstain circles the lot and parks out by the pumps and kills his lights and just sits there watching me. Asshole. So I saunter thru the store and grab my energy drinks and this assclown is still sitting there just watching. So I make deliberate motions letting him now that I am talking about him and pointing at him. I buy my stuff and ask the clerk for a pen and paper. Time for a little game. I walk over to the glass door and hold the paper up to it, look right at the cop and jot a quick note and hand it to the clerk, hoping the cop would think I was documenting something about him. As soon as I flipped the paper to the clerk the cop kicked his lights on and hauled ass out of the lot like he got this sudden emergency call or some shit. I know god damn good and well he didn’t because the other cop was still just sitting in the corner of the lot, jerking off or eating a donut or something. The clerk read the note and busted up laughing. He reads the note out loud to the other clerk on duty " That cop is a complete asshole." He then proceeds to tell me about how this same assfuck is in the lot harassing people all the time and gets all pissed off when they make him pay for his coffee. So this afternoon when I got home I called the fuckers watch commander and dropped the hammer on him. Asshole. Maybe I should have just let it be, maybe not. I’m not doing anything wrong. I’m just going to work so FUCK YOU! You had best get over yourself and double quick. Asshole. Go make yourself useful somewhere. That’s what you are getting paid to do. With my tax dollars I might add. You aren’t getting paid to be a total fuckin’ asshole so knock it the fuck off. Whats the matter? Daddy fuck you in the ass one too many times and now you got an attitude? Your mom used to gangbang bikers by the dozen so now you gotta fuck with me? Or are you pissed than I am everything you don’t have the guts to be? Whatever your fuckin’ trip is you had best step off my dick, motherfucker. Wonder how much money I could make suing the county for harassment? Asshole.